Chicago Pizza San Diego

First of all, TripAdvisor: The most common and appropriate spelling among grammar nerds is "adviser, " not "advisor." You've already lost credibility with a judicious pizza-eating lobby. We spend a lot of time at computers, ordering delivery. Don't mess with us.

But to your larger point: SAN DIEGO? Are you kidding? Are we being punked?

A San Diego pizzeria owner quoted in news stories about the poll results said restaurants in San Diego take their pizza seriously: "We want to change this idea of pizza as fast food."

Um, welcome to 1980. Chicago has been serving up gourmet pizza by the slice for decades. There is no such thing here as "fast food pizza." It doesn't exist. Even our downtown food trucks, grocery stores and on-the-go pizza proprietors serve up slices that would put San Diego's "Italian pies" to shame.

Also: Nobody calls it "pie."

New York City made the Top 10, taking fourth place as best pizza city. Yes, New York City where pizza is folded over and eaten like a sandwich.

There's a word for that: soggy. Quality pizza crust isn't supposed to bend in half.

We called TripAdvisor.com (which, ahem, should be TripadvisEr.com) to get the cross tabs on its "poll." We noticed the company plugged San Diego as a terrific vacation spot a few months ago. Do you smell conspiracy? We do. But we always do.

A company spokeswoman said the travel site regularly invites users to review restaurants. San Diego came away with the highest average rating among restaurants that serve pizza.

We asked the spokeswoman if she ever tasted Chicago pizza.

"No. But I know Chicago is well known for deep dish, " she replied.

And thin crust and goat cheese with caramelized onions and homemade sausage with sun-dried tomatoes and on and on.

All you really need to know about the legitimacy of the poll is this: Las Vegas ranked just behind San Diego as best pizza city. Ah yes, the discerning palates of all-you-can-eat buffet connoisseurs who prefer coagulated cheese pizza warmed up in the hotel microwave.

San Diego: We'll give you best climate. We'll even give you best summer vacation spot. You're down for best zoo. And of course, best scandal (ahem, Mayor Bob Filner?)